In about a month I will take my youngest son, Jacob away for a weekend. I won't even preach that weekend, it will be all about him and I. My father-in-law, Jacob's grandpa will come too. What we will do that weekend is our very best attempt to speak into Jacob's heart and prepare him for adolescence.
My goal will be to prepare Jacob for the changes ahead of him. Changes in his body, his emotions, his self-awareness...and his transition into becoming a man.
I want to alert him to the on-coming canyon he will face in terms of feeling inferior (as every young person does at some point). And to let him know that he won't be the same physically as others or the same intellectually as others or the same with money or status...and that is alright. Because who he is...is who his heavenly Father says he is (and who we help to shape him into as his parents).
We will discuss how to handle peer pressure and fears of rejection and failure and unpopularity. Doing what is right is always better than being in with the right crowd.
We will talk openly about puberty and all the hormonal changes that are awaiting him.
We will talk about what real love is and the difference between love and sex.
We will talk about all the intense emotions he will feel and experience during adolescence and his desire to be independent from us (his mom and dad).
The reason I am spelling all of this out...is because I am nervous. I need prayer.
I have already done this with my oldest son, Jonathan. And to mark the occasion I gave him a gift that he can carry into adulthood. I will do the same with Jacob.
It is all about him seeing clearly the transition from childhood and boyhood to manhood. It is his own Bar Mitzvah. In Jewish tradition this has evolved to another form of a graduation party...but the reality is in times past it bore with it the clear indication that now the young person was responsible for his/her actions. And typically that was at the transition of adolescence...around 13 years old.
The reason I choose around eleven is to catch him before these things start to happen...to let him not be caught unaware.
It is hard to be a dad in these wierd times. But my two sons are my whole life and hopefully with our upcoming weekend in April...we will honor God with what we do and we will help one young boy begin his path to manhood that weekend as well.
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