A Drive Home One Day

My sinful attitude and nature still amazes me. I don't know why, I've lived with it all my life and have been cognitively aware of it for many years now. But still, I am a sinner. And that was made very clear to me on my most recent drive home.

It began with the lady that pulled out in front of me on her cell phone. It really isn't a giant thing, but I can't effectively communicate to you how steamed I got at that simple driving incident. In my anger I wished many driving perils upon her and all her future generations. And then it hit me, I'm sinning. I am angry (not a sin) and wishing terrible things for this lady who may have been talking to the Dr. from the ICU telling her that she needs to rush in because there wasn't much time for her loved one.

But because she was a lady that cut me off and because she was on a cell phone, in an instant of anger I realized that I am a sexist jerk who has no idea what it is like to put himself in someone else's shoes.

And then, not too much farther down the road in my quick drive home I noticed someone walking on the side of the road. She too was a lady. A very pretty lady. A very pretty lady wearing a very tight shirt and very short shorts. I think I took three long looks at her as I passed her by and then one more for good luck in the rear view mirror as I was farther down the road.

And then it hit me, I'm sinning. I wasn't undressing this gal in my mind I want you to understand that. But I was lingering on her shapes and curves enough for me to understand that I had forgotten something. Here's what I forgot in my moment of "window shopping"...I forgot about the beauty of my own wife AND I forgot that the lady I was looking at was also someone else's daughter or someone else's mother or someone else's grandchild.

She is not a piece of meat for me to admire, she is a child of God, someone for whom Jesus came and died on the cross for. And I forgot that in that 30 seconds that this incident took.

And then a little farther down the road, just before I got home, I was slowed down by an elderly woman who could barely see over her steering wheel. And again anger slowly started to rise up in me as I drove. I think I thought something like this, "I can't believe that she is allowed to even be driving! Somebody needs to take her license away."

Now she hadn't done anything particularly wrong. She wasn't driving erratically. She wasn't even really going slow, honestly...she was just driving the speed limit. Her great trespass against me - she slowed me down. I was speeding, she was abiding by the law. And to top it off, she was elderly.

And then it hit me, I was sinning again. This older woman made me (by the fact that I was behind her) slow my life down (and I didn't like it). I realized that I sin all the time. I speed too much. But that is just a small part of a bigger picture, I speed with my life too. I am always on hyper drive it seems. I don't slow down enough and I miss a lot of life as a result.

This older woman's other crime was that she was old. I realized in this small span of time that I am a bigot. I don't like older people. I realized in those few moments that I drove behind her that I have had some pretty negative run-ins with elderly people that have soured me just enough to lump most of them into the same boat. And that is wrong.

Wow! What a drive home. What a wretched worm of a sinner I am that I can't even drive less than 10 miles to my home without falling into sin within the confines of my car. (Just imagine what I am capable of when I am not driving!)

In that short drive home I was made to realize that I am still in need of my Savior. I am still in need of Jesus' saving grace. I am not that far progressed beyond when Jesus first saved me 24 years ago.

Everything else in my life I do at a fast pace, but when it comes to growing and maturing for the Lord I move at the slowest of snail's paces. I am a very, very slow learner in these things.

Each and every day I need to do what Paul commands for us in Romans 12:1-2..."Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God-this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will." (NIV)

I need to climb back up on the altar again and burn up all my sinful self and dedicate the rest of my ash-ridden self to God's purposes.

New Video Used in Sermon

This short little video we shot on a whim last week as a last minute addition to an illustration for last Sunday's sermon (http://www.godsfort.org/resources/sermons/audio/bridge3.mp3). The version we show at church during service does not include the credits at the end. We put the credits in on Youtube to give credit where credit is due. Here's the video...

THE DAY

At the time of me writing this, I have 11 days, 3 hours, 23 minutes and 42 seconds before we leave for Disney World. I am so excited I can barely wait. I am so ready to check out of here and not think about church stuff, sermons, strategies or structure the whole time I'm gone.

I'm not taking my laptop or my pocket pc because I am not going to check my e-mail while I am gone. I am going to be completely disconnected. And I can't wait.

But my wife keeps telling me, don't wish your life away. We have living to do before the vacation comes. She's right. I know she is. But man it is hard to do when you're excited about something.

On the other end of the spectrum, last night I visited with a woman whose husband I buried this past Friday. Her daughter called me on Monday and set up the appointment. She said her mom has been inconsolable and she wanted to know if I could come and visit with her mom.

So last night I sat there as she told me how grueling each and every moment is. How every TV show is horrible, every movie because those are all things that she used to do with him and now she can't share the experience with anyone.

And this poor widow who was hurting so much wanted very much for God to take her as well because it is so hard to face each day alone.

And I want a section of my life to go quicker because I want to go to Disney! What shame.

There is a period, future-oriented that I can long for. I am allowed to do it. It is THE DAY. The day that we get to go to heaven and be with the Lord. The Scriptures say, "Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere." (Psalm 84:10)

I am not a universalist. I don't believe we're all going to heaven when we die, but I sincerely hope that those people, like the dear one I was with last night will one day know the Lord.

Because to grieve and not have hope is excruciating. I had no comfort to give. I had a few words to offer. A prayer and a hug. But nothing beyond that. She was in the midst of pure, unbridled grief. And that big black bag of sorrows is hard to bear.

I need to not wish my life away like my wife says...but I do long for a day when this is all over. When the people that I minister to won't have unbearable grief anymore. I long for THE DAY. I hope that day comes soon (maybe even before I pay off my house - that would be great!)

Floppy Hats and Noisy Turtles

Something horrible happened today. Something that stopped me in my tracks. And if I was totally honest with you, almost brought me to tears (and that takes a lot).

My external hard drive crashed. And it really is hard to communicate to you how much work and how many hours and how much expended energy is represented by that fact. I even lost this coming Sunday's sermon. (Something that almost made me cuss!)

This seemingly small thing, affected me in a tremendous way today. My spirits were darker than they have been for a long time. We had a prior commitment as a family to go to a Bible study earlier this evening over to the home of some very good friends of ours.

I most sincerely did NOT want to go. I was in no mood for it. But I went. And I am glad that I did. Because the time there was not what I thought it would be. You see, I thought I would just be there thinking the whole time about my computer issues and how to overcome them.

But it wasn't like that. I enjoyed my time. I slowed down. It was a little like an oasis. It was retreat-like. More than usual.

Something interesting happened before we got there that set the stage for that to be able to happen to me I believe. We were running late, and right as we were getting ready to go my wife told me that we needed to stop at the grocery store to get some ice cream to add to her homemade black bottom banana bars.

Now, logic would tell me that the pan of banana bars is more than sufficient to fulfill the desert role, but logic has never won an argument for me yet. So we went to the grocery store.

As I sat stewing in my already stressed out state behind the wheel, my wife ran into the store to get the ice cream. And then I noticed a lady coming out.

She was wearing a denim floppy hat. And as she walked closer in front of my vehicle, I saw the reason for the hat. She had no hair. None. I surmised it was because of recent chemo therapy treatments she was undergoing. She also looked skinny and pale. She was an older lady. But there was something in the way she walked.

And then it hit me like a half gallon of ice cream upside the head. I knew why my hard drive broke down in one of my more intensely busy ministry weeks of this year. I knew why my wife hadn't gotten ice cream earlier in the day ( I would have even settled for earlier that hour). You see, had those things not happened then I would not have been able to catch the lesson.

As that dear child of God walked in front of my vehicle, God whispered to me that my "problems" aren't really problems at all. I am upset over all the wrong things.

And then here's the other interesting tid bit, as I write this, late in the evening, trying to get ready for a funeral service the next morning, my turtle has decided to begin to climb and clamor and make all sorts of ruckus. This wouldn't be a big problem except for the fact that his nighttime accommodations are a 20 gallon long aquarium located next to my computer desk.

And so I was getting frustrated that as I was getting to my most important point about me being distracted and upset over all the wrong things, my noisy turtle was ruining my concentration!

I am a mere mortal man. With the attention span of a toddler and the will power of a wino and the spiritual fortitude of a twig...you'd think I have no business leading a congregation of people closer to God.

But what I do know is that when life throws out failed hard drives and noisy turtles God will have a tendency to have someone cross your path in a denim floppy hat to remind you that there is much more to life than the things we seem to focus on.

So here I am, Lord. I humbly ask you to shake me up. I invite you whole-heartedly to rock my world. And as you do those things, could you also bring my hard drive back to life and make my turtle be a little more quiet? If not, that's okay. I love how you show me your truths each day!

FREE

From SiMPLE CHURCH by Thom Rainer and Eric Geiger...

One of the happiest days in the life of Jose Diaz was Sunday morning, August 7, 2005. It occurred at Christ Fellowship in Miami, Florida. For the first time Jose was able to worship sitting next to his father, Luis Diaz. Luis had been a believer for many years, but had never attended church with his son, Jose.

He couldn't. He was in prison, for twenty-six years.

On Sunday, August 7, 2005, they worshipped together. Luis Diaz was released four days earlier because DNA testing had proven his innocence. He had been wrongfully convicted. Because of the evidence, he was no longer considered the Bird Road rapist. You probably saw the story on the news. It made the national headlines.

The Bird Road rapist was on the prowl from 1977 to 1979. Many victims described him as an English-speaking Latin male, over six feel tall, and weighing approximately two hundred pounds. He sometimes took things from the victims.

After her attack, the first victim saw Luis Diaz at the gas station where she worked.

Four days earlier she provided police with a description: Latin male, six feet tall, about two hundred pounds, English-speaking, with a two-door green or black car. Luis Diaz drove into the gas station in his green four-door Chevrolet. The victim called the police with his license number, and she later identified him as her attacker from his driver license picture. Diaz weighed 134 pounds and was five feet three inches tall. He was married with three children. He spoke no English. at this time no charges were filed.

The attacks continued, and the public grew more and more concerned. The police focused on Diaz. Another victim made an identification of him from a photographic array. He was arrested in August 1979. Two days later fourteen victims viewed a live lineup. Five victims identified Diaz positively. Later several more victims identified Diaz from a video lineup. Prosecutors brought eight charges against him.

Luis Diaz insisted he was innocent and went to trial in May 1980. There was no physical evidence connecting Diaz to the crime. A search of Diaz's home produced no items taken from victims. No weapon was ever found. No semen or blood was found in Diaz's car, though four of the victims had been raped in the attacker's car. Most of the victims had described the attacker as taller and heavier.

Diaz, because of his job as a fry cook, reeked of onions after his night shift. None of the victims described an odor. Despite all the evidence to the contrary, Diaz was found guilty and sentenced to multiple life sentences.

In 1993, two victims came forward and recanted their identifications of Diaz. Jose, his son, began researching DNA testing and how it was used to overturn wrongful convictions. He knew his father was innocent. He wrote letters and partnered with groups such as the Innocence Project to produce a motion for DNA testing. DNA tests from two of the victims proved the same person raped them. It was not Diaz.

All charges were dropped, and Diaz was freed after twenty-six years.

Like Jose Diaz, we are called to free prisoners. Not from physical jail cells but from spiritual ones. We are called to offer freedom to those who are imprisoned by sin.

In Luke 4:18 Jesus said...He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners... (NIV)